The Glorious Prenup

If I’m to discuss dating, I should discuss the end of dating. In most cases that means marriage. In other rare cases, a person has discovered a real flesh sex toy and an ideal porn site. I’m going to basically ignore the latter and discuss marriage. Specifically, the prenuptial agreement. Let me start by saying this: prenups are NOT a bad thing. I find it amazing that people find it offensive when they are presented with a prenup. Love does not conquer all, sweethearts. Every divorced couple out there started their marriages with the mindset that they loved each other too much to end in an ugly divorce. Then the ugliness happened. He kept leaving his dirty underwear on the floor and she kept talking to her mother about their sex life. BAM. That sweet optimistic couple turned into a couple of bickering a-holes who are forced to split their belongings. Prenups are useful in these situations.

I know that there may be situations where someone can be a complete dick when making out a prenup, but you have to be optimistic. Prenups are good whether you are rich or poor. You don’t want to commit yourself and all your stuff to another person only to have it all taken away in a divorce. Prenups for Lovers: A Romantic Guide to Prenuptial Agreements. This lovely lady’s book will help you to talk to your one and only about getting a prenup as well as execute one flawlessly. Look into it.

You can also get really creative with your prenuptial agreements these days. You can put in your prenup that if your spouse does not have sex with you at least X amount of times a month, then they will owe you X amount of money at the end of the marriage. I’m looking into a postnuptial agreement with my husband so that I can put that in there. If that doesn’t get his heels clicking, then for every month that he doesn’t put out X amount of times, he’ll have to carry a Barbie lunch box to work for a week. I’m not after his money. It’s his manhood I want and I LOVE that a prenup can help me. Penup isn’t a bad word. It’s a precaution. A smart precaution.

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